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Ok, hopefully you know I am being sarcastic. I couldn’t literally die or else I wouldn’t be posting. Well, I suppose there could be wifi in heaven- I bet it is dial up in hell.
I was reading a best selling author’s book. The chick was kissing the sexy vampire, and the chick says that her head was literally spinning from the kiss. Literally? Did the vampire kiss cause her to pull a Linda Blair? Did the vampire call in the exorcist? Get thee behind me poor editor!
I had to stop reading. This isn’t some new author. She has had quite a few books under her belt. This is a rookie mistake. Heck I wouldn’t even make this one, but then it is a pet peeve of mine.
So that leads me to my next thought, what mistakes have I made that drive readers crazy? I already posted about how I lost the short story contest because of editing errors.
Some of them I can blame on MS WORD because it auto corrected things like capitalizing the word following a quote, when it shouldn’t have corrected them. I really can’t blame anyone but myself though.
I have been reading, over and over sometimes, different editors’ blogs and tips. I am hoping they will sink in and stay inside this hard head of mine.
One thing I do know, the only person who literally had their head spin was in The Exorcist.
I have been having a problem with spiders at the house. Arizona brown Spiders have decided to do battle with my family. The are related to the brown recluse. They have a nasty bite. So far we have been victorious, but it was touch and go for a while there. Good thing the hubby has a lot of life insurance. hmmm.
oh, uh anyway, I had the bug people come out and spray the house again. The problem is I can’t breathe the poison in so I had to leave the house.
I went to the library where I couldn’t sign on because of network problems. no biggie, I figured I could work on my short story for Accentuate’s July/August contest. After a couple of hours I go home and immediately start having trouble breathing. I head back out to the MCDonald’s that advertises wifi available. Turns out it ain’t free.
So I spend the day writing and finishing my story. That’s it. I could probably squeeze out an article but the story kind of wrung me out. It was a little close to home and I cried while writing it. Hope that means it is good enough to win this time. I sure as heck plan on editing the heck out of it.
So, now I know work on fiction when I am done with the non fiction stuff. Got it.
Off to go get a breath of fresh air while picking up the child from daycare.
A pic of the monsters, yea, it isn’t that clear, but if I got to close it would eat me!
Michy issued a challenge on her blog to come up with 15 weird or random things about yourself and post them on your blog. My dear friend Susan took up the challenge too so I thought about it and decided, why not? So here you are in no certain order…
1. My great,great grandmother was a Witch in Italy. From what I hear she wasn’t very nice either.
2. I have prophetic dreams. Not always, and not for things that are useful like the winning powerball numbers or anything. But I did predict 2 of my friend’s pregnancies, once before she even knew herself.
3. I dream mostly in nightmares. I thought it was normal until I read something somewhere that most people have less than 12 a year or something. I have them so often they don’t bother me anymore.
4. I have lost my faith in God. I believe he is real, I just don’t think he is the right guy for me. It’s been a hard few years and my faith has been tested. It failed miserably.
5. I would have killed myself last year if it wasn’t for my son. Last year was the worst in my life. I had a severe hyperemesis pregnancy that drove me into the deepest pit of depression. After the baby died I just wanted to die too. I couldn’t because I didn’t want to leave my then 3 year old son without his mom.
6. I am very cheap, but will occasionally waste money on stupid things. I think it is a control thing. I keep a tight control and then lose it and buy a Coach purse or something stupid.
7. I am a real bitch. If I said half the things I thought, I would be all alone because no one could stand me.
8. I like being alone, which makes #7 a hard one to control. If I didn’t have to work or have a family I would stay inside like a hermit and be perfectly happy.
9. Reading is my escape. It is also my addiction. If I start a book I have a hard time putting it down. I will stay up all night reading and wake up miserable for it. I know better, but I do it anyway.
10. I have only really gotten angry 3 or 4 times in my life. I am talking truly angry. I am told it is a scary thing to see. My voice drops, my body shakes and I am barely in control. The last time was when dad’s “caregiver” left her charges home alone.
11. I don’t cry in front of people. Ok, once or twice I have but rarely. My husband has only seen me cry twice. We have been together 11 years.
12. I am not a good mother. I struggle every day not to yell at my boy. That was how I was raised and try as I might not to, I do the same thing to my son. I hate it. I work on stopping it. But I do it.
13. I am super lazy. I worry that if I did freelance writing full time that I would sit around and not write.
14. Kissing me on my neck drives me crazy. If you ever want to get some from me, that is the way to do it.
15. I am super nice to people I don’t like. I think it comes from growing up working in my parents restaurant. I learned how to compartmentalize my feelings enough that I can smile and be friendly with someone I loathe.
OK whew, there you go. The good, the bad and the ugly. Michy and Susan are right, it isn’t easy. Go check out their answers while you recover from the shock of me…
The proof is in the pudding? Anyway, what I am babbling about is why I lost the contest. That’s right folks came in 4th place. It was very close, so close in fact it came down to counting the editing mistakes.
I had more.
It is a very good lesson to learn- edit edit edit! Enlist someone else to help you edit. Also turn off the auto edit feature on your word processing program. There were mistake that my good friend Susan caught that I corrected- that showed up again.
See my rooky mistakes in this blog post in Michy’s editing & Proofreading Blog here . As soon as I read this post I smacked my head because the mistakes were glaringly obvious when someone else wrote them. I wondered how I could have missed it with my own writing. It is very hard to edit your own work.
I had some wonderful feedback though. I plan on cleaning up the story and submitting it to a magazine. All is not lost!
I have already sent in my money for this month’s contest. If you are a writer I highly recommend checking out this site and entering the contest.
Good luck!
The news was posted today. I am one of 7 finalists. Well really one of 6- one person entered twice and both stories were picked. Over achiever! hehe
I am very shocked because, quite frankly, some of those stories were really good. Professional writer good. So even if I don’t win I will be happy having made it to the finalists. but, I really want to win.
I could never make it on one of those awards shows. Anyone see the Friends episode where Joey is up for a daytime Emmy and he loses? He had been practicing his losing face all week but come crunch time he just has a fit. He is cussing and all ticked off and the camera catches his temper tantrum. It is too funny! That would be me. Thank God there isn’t video on this laptop!
I especially want to thank my fellow writer and good friend Susan Sosbe. Her edits really helped me with my story. She very gently pointed out when the story didn’t make sense. Please give her some link love people…Susan’s AC page and click on the Blonder by the Moment link. She has a gift for comedy, and has one the 1st official AC April Fools challenge with her Smoking diary of a quitter.
If you want to see what the buzz is about, check out this site. I am telling you, if you are an aspiring writer this is the site you should get to know!
On the radio this morning I heard the DJs saying that hookers have been affected by the economic downturn (still NOT a recession right Bush?). I don’t know if they were serious or joking.
I thought about it and I can see how sex workers could be suffering. Their clients have less money to spend, that means straight sex, no more kinky stuff that costs extra.
Those clients who have lost their jobs probably can’t afford to go see a hooker anymore. Plus many men probably are depressed and worried about the finances. Stress and depression can cause impotence- and who wants to waste a perfectly good sex worker by not being able to perform?!
So please, throw your sex worker/hooker a, uh, bone this week. Go visit her or him and help them get through this economic tough times! There is nothing sadder than a sex worker on the unemployment line!
