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Happy Thanksgiving everyone! I have been sick so after cooking all day in a daze, I sat down and couldn’t taste a darn thing. The turkey was moist and the family raved so it must have been good.
We have a lot to be thankful for this year. Most recently, I am thankful for screw ups. You see, dad choked on a huge piece of ham this weekend. The care home he is at is supposed to be cutting up his food. The caregiver gave him some water- something you never give a choking person because it cuts off the airflow if they had some. He managed to get the water out and was still breathing when they took him to hospital. But, when they took him to get x-rays he coded blue. My brother in law saw 15 doctors and nurses go running with a crash cart. He said to himself, man, that guy is in bad shape, then he realized it was my dad.
They brought him back with the paddles, got the ham out and he is fine. Here’s where the screw up comes in- he has a DNR. They aren’t supposed to be bringing him back at all. Luckily, the care home gave the paramedics the wrong medical info. If they hadn’t, we wouldn’t have had him at the table with us again this year.
I am also thankful for my funny little 4 year old boy. My mother in law asked him if he was going to say Grace. He asked, “What’s that?” She said, “It’s what you say before eating.” His response, “Oh I thought you say Bon Appetit”
He cracks me up! Happy Thanksgiving everyone and Bon Appetit!
Today we got a call from the rehab nurses. Dad was very agitated and was very upset and screaming. I felt guilty for not going there sooner today. He really wanted to see one of his daughters.
Plus my 4 year old is sick with a fever. I felt guilty for leaving him to go see my dad. He wants mommy to hold him and rub his back.
My sister and I go every other day so he always has a visit from one of us every day. We feel guilty about not going everyday. It’s hard though. I work all day go to dad’s and then get home about 7 to make dinner and put the little guy to bed on those nights.
I feel guilty for not wanting to go. I hate going. The visit consists of me reminding my father he can not get up and get in to bed by himself at least 5 times. He broke his hip when he fell the last time he wouldn’t listen.
He is getting worse. He is Bi-polar and I think they have cut back his meds. Today he was convinced that they were torturing him because they put him in a recliner after getting him in and out of bed 7 times. He thinks they are holding him prisoner and they are evil. So we will probably have to move him this week because he has it set in his mind that they are evil and we won’t be able to change it.
He knows sometimes that something isn’t right. He told me today he wondered what was wrong with his speech. The incredibly intelligent man can’t get the words out and he is frustrated by it.
He said he wishes he could just die it would be so much better for him. This is something he has expressed more than once after we found him in a hypoglycemic coma nearly dead. I don’t know what to say to him. I feel guilty for saving his life by worrying about not hearing from and having him check on. I feel guilty for thinking that I should have let him die rather than suffer this way.
Every day is a challenge that I am not sure I can rise to.
Dad fell and broke his hip on friday. This is his 3rd month in a row that he has been at the hospital. The ER staff recognizes us now. I think he gets the 4th month free. He fell while trying to get up from a recliner without help. It is his fault for falling because he had been cautioned time and time again not to get up on his own because he might fall. I don’t blame the caregiver for this accident.
What made me furious beyond belief was when my sister, her hubby and I went to the “caregiver’s” house to get his stuff and move him out after staying for only 2 weeks, no one was there.
There are 5 residents that can’t take care of themselves included one in hospice and she freakin left them alone to run to walgreens. I was so mad I was shaking. If there had been a fire they would all have died a horrible death. We waited until she came back so they wouldn’t be alone. If one of them had a medical problem we couldn’t help except to call 911.
Thursday we got a call from dad upset because she had locked them out of their rooms. When he was talking to my sister she was shouting over him on the phone. She apparently had just made the beds and didn’t want them messed up. Too bad if someone was tired and wanted to take a nap.
She serves expired food to the residents. She talks and berates them like they are children. My dad was humiliated time and again because he had an accident in bed or for some other reason.
I feel so bad for those people left behind. We are very active in my dad’s care. We talk to him daily and visit him often. The others hardly ever had vistors or calls. She was so nice when we were trying to decide where to place him. She had us fooled.
I am calling the health dept on tuesday. It was just criminal of her to leave those people alone.
Dad had surgery today. He will have another round of therapy and then we need to find a new place for him. But he will never, ever go back to that woman’s house!
